The Birds and the Bees for Trees (A Little Fatherleaf Advice)

Father Plant: Hey son, come swing by me.
Son Plant: Hey dad, what's up.
Father Plant: You're getting older and I see you looking at other leaves, so let me give you a little piece of advice my father gave me. Leaves of 3 leave them be.
Son Plant: Leaves of 3 leave them be?? Why?
Father Plant: 'Cuz they're no good, and are dirty. Very very dirty.
Son Plant: Dirty??
Father Plant: Yes dirty!!! You mess with a 3 leafed chick, and you're dickstem will swell up, get all red, be itching all day, and will be oozing pus like a leaky slurpee machine at 7-11 until the day you become mulch!!
Son Plant: Geez!!! Well, what about 4 leafed girls??
Father Plant: Ahh, 4 leaved girls. Now those are the real prize. I've had a few 4's back in my day. Leaves of 3, leave them be, but leaves of 4, have some more, and more, and more, and more more more, hahahaa.
Son Plant: Uhhh, thanks dad... I guess.
Father Plant: No problem son, that's what I'm here for. Now go swing over to your mom and tell her to bring her thick ass veins and sexy apex over here so I can tear her Pulvinus up!!!
Son Plant: Grose dad!!!